Sunday, September 26, 2010

I need a specialty therapist...

Ever watch those "Hoarder" shows?? I am fascinated by them. The type A personality in me wants to just throw it all away very quickly. The therapists that assist with the clean up are so calm and so patient. Hours and hours of talking about each and every little thing they pick up. Then every couple hours they assess the anxiety of the hoarder. That would be a job that would definitely be an epic fail for me!
As I have mentioned before, I have been working on re-organizing all my long term storage and getting it all in better plastic buckets and safe from bugs, water, etc. Which basically means I am re-living my life one little object at a time. As I go through one box of stuff I realize I have another or 5 in another storage part of the house. I am hoping tomorrow to go through the other TWO storage spots and clear it out of any boxes labeled "memories". Today was about age 10 to 26ish. I spent a good 2 hours going through ALL the mail and pictures in a box that was labeled "B&K mail". B being my ex husband Bill. I am a great ex wife, even if he doesn't think so. I separated all his personal mail, mostly from his friends from Brazil, and set it aside to mail it to him. I went through boxes of cards and gifts for Austin. Austin was the first Brimley grandchild and I think that all of the friends of the Brimleys friends sent cards and gifts. I was very grateful and remember all the thank you cards. I feel bad for Daniel, he was the 6th grandchild and I haven't quite got to his stuff...hoping for more stuff. Daniel kept wandering in and asking me what things were and I was showing him pics of me at a school dance and my first boyfriend (A guitarist in a band with hair longer then mine!!) and he kept looking at piles of stuff and asking if it was his. We finally ran across his TaiKwonDo stuff and he decided to try on his white shirt he wore (pics to come later) and then we found his glasses and they about made him puke. He read a letter he picked up from Bill to me and we decided it was when Bill was in Nashville and I was in Utah the summer I was pregnant with Jake. It was fun to have him around and asking questions. I even found stuff I had accumulated when I was having difficulty getting pregnant including IVF and adoption stuff. Why I hung on to all this stuff, I have no idea!
THUS the idea of a specialty therapist. Is this object a valid memory? What do I keep when I'm divorced? How many cards do I keep?? Are old newspapers with specific special dates of any value? Do I really need to keep all my old doll stuff??

Get the idea?

Does everyone that goes through memories have such an emotionally exhausting time?
I am sure this purge is extra difficult. I am pretty sure that for the last 15 years I have been moving boxes around and not going through them. I even found 1998's taxes! Plus I am purging some of the religious things that I don't think I need and yet I am keeping some that do mean something to me. What I thought would take a day is at day 2 and probably is going to take me another 5 full days. Shhhhhh....don't tell Matt!
Some things are great. My friends. I miss some of them so much. Why did I fall out of touch? I found so many things from high school that made me smile. Crazy kids! Ton's of letters from friends! How lucky to have grown up with "notes" at school and real letters in the mail. I tell myself I should send more hand written letters, but I don't know where on the list of to do's that that particular desire would fall.
One thing I know for sure is that looking though my childhood is hilarious! I crack myself up!! I have a couple of self histories I wrote in elementary school. I found stories I wrote in college - that were actually very good.

I'd like to share something. It's not dated, but I'm guessing that is was around 5th grade.

1. When I grow up I would like to be... HORSE WIFE (yikes!!)

2. When I get older, I would like to see... PRIVATE (with lines above and below the word - nasty!)

3. What will it be like for me in the next grade.. SCARY, HARD WORKING

4. What kind of adult (or parent) would I like to be? an example

5. What friends that I have now would I like to have when I grow up? friends like - Cindy - Michelle - Renne and Diane

6. What might I look like? Long hair and glasses (Mostly true)

7. Where might I live? Hawie (I am guessing Hawaii)

8. What might my home be like? Straw (WHAT??)

9. What style of clothes would I like to wear? bicini shorts tank tops

10. What amount of money might I earn? $50 a week (dream big!)

11. What job might provide that income? Store Keeper (Husband) I guess that means my husband owns the store and I just work there. Guess I hadn't burned my bra yet.

12. If my job requires that I work only three days a week, how will I spend my leisure time? working in the house. really? ew

13. What kind of transportation might I use? walk (I was such a tree-hugger!)

I think it's funny. All my dreams of being a house(horse) wife and working at my husband shop! Who knew I would turn out with a car and a real house? I would love to live in Hawaii though!

Blog on!........

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