Here is her pictorial as seen through the eyes of her very worried mom.
In her room, waiting to go to CT. Then in the wheel chair waiting for the scanner. The CT tech let me see the CT (I know her from my bazillion trips to the scanner with my patients.)
She (the tech) stated that Sami has a cute brain. I must concur. Not so smart, but very cute!! (just kidding Sami!)
Can I tell you how much I love this man?? He was there when she passed out and woke her up and made sure she was OK. Gave her some juice and took care of her. My worst fear for all those years I was single was my kids and not being able to care for them. I am so grateful to Matt for the love and kindness he shows my kids.
Hooked up. She thought this was a legal maneuver, showing off her pulse ox sticker. Frankly, I think she's just giving me the bird, flipping me off, or as I like to think - showing me that I am number one!
Ruh Roh! Here she is getting ready to Yack! She waited for Dr. Nirula to walk in first, but was kind enough to get it ALL in that little bitty kidney bowl they have.
Feeling better and back to texting. I just love this little girl! She can be a little sassy, but for a 16 year old girl, she is strong, smart and very very very very good lookin!
Her parting gift: A prescription for anti-nausea suppositories and some free lube! (I use the term "free" very loosely)
I offered to help her if she needed some, but she refused.
The day this happened I was feeling very disconnected and odd. I don't know any other way to explain it. When I got home from my day, I wrote down my experience and how I was feeling. I don't know if anyone else (out of my 10 readers) ever feels this way, but I just had to write it down.
Here is my version of the day:
Déjà Vu
03/22/2009
This morning I could hardly focus on anything. Flashes of people I recognized and things I had done and conversations I had had flashed in my mind. It was happening while I was talking to people and trying to do tasks at work. I had a difficult patient with both an LVAD and RVAD with CVVHD and an open chest and belly. He was going to go to the OR after 11 and so his family was in there and I was answering questions and taking care of the patient. I felt like I couldn’t concentrate. It was like I was re-living something I had already lived before only I had this horrible feeling. I was flustered and could not keep on task. I resorted to writing everything down as I thought about it (the tasks to do) so that I could take good care of my patient.
I have had many déjà vu. Most are fleeting, but it seems like I dream stuff and then it happens. Is it for-warning? I have no idea. I have tried to start a dream journal, because I have such bizarre dreams, but I never write in it. This experience was almost like I had dreamt it last night and now I was experiencing it.
I thought maybe I was feeling weird because I hadn’t eaten. I grabbed a cup of OJ and some carrots and wolfed those down. But I still felt disconnected. I told my friend Jen at work that I felt really weird like something was going to happen to my kids or something.
I can’t remember how much later – maybe an hour – Sami called me and I just happen to be at a point where I could answer my cell phone. This rarely happens, even when I’m expecting a call, if I’m at work, chances are I won’t be able to answer it. She said that Matt had texted me that she had passed out in the kitchen and hit her head. I asked her a few questions and then called Matt and told him to get her up to the ER. I’m sure if I would have been at home and watched it I wouldn’t have freaked out as much, but not knowing why it happened and if her head was ok, was causing me some visible distress.
I looked at the Trauma call list to see who the attending was. I work with them pretty closely and I wanted to know if Trauma would see her or if just the ER doc’s would. I found out it was Dr. Nirula and he happened to be our attending in the SICU also. So, I walked the unit and when I asked the resident if she had seen him, he called out from the PAX (x-ray) room. As soon as I opened my mouth to talk to him I started bawling. Why do I have to love my kids so much and get so worked up at the very idea that she might really be hurt? More than ANYTHING I hate crying at work. I don’t know why. I work with some of my very bests friends (as they have come to be) and have cried WITH them for one reason or another.
Dr. Nirula was awesome. He is number one in my book. He is the end all be all to me. He called down to the ER and had Sami listed as a Trauma 3 so that they would take her right in and he could take a look at her. How awesome is that!!! I was still shook up but it made me feel better. I told the charge nurse what happened and started crying AGAIN and since he was training another charge nurse he was able to take over my patient and send him off to the OR while I went down to the ER.
I have to thank my ever present OCD habits at this time. My patient was all ready for the ER and I felt good leaving him with another nurse. Of course, Stewart is mucho smarto and he was my first preceptor when I was a CCNI, so he (my patient) would have been in good hands either way.
Matt texted me and by the time I walked downstairs they had her in a room and hooking her up to the monitor – insert mom beginning to cry again. Long story short, they don’t know why she fainted but it was probably just a vaso-vagal response that just happens sometimes. A CT scan was done and her noggin was in the clear. Her labs looked fine and her exam was negative. The resident taking care of her had already done her rotation in the SICU so it was nice to see her. Then the attending in the ER came in and gave me his card and he watched over her personally. Dr. Nirula came down to talk to us and see her. Just as he walked in she turned gray and vomited. So, they gave her a liter of fluid and some IV nausea medicine and watched her for a bit. She ended up going home after about an hour. I am still worried about why it happened and I think I’ll take her to her regular doctor to just do some checking, but it sure did freak me out. My mother instinct was just too strong.
While this was going on I checked on my patient in the OR and he was hanging in there. Then when they had planned her discharge and I had talked to the attending I headed back up to the OR. Sami was on her way home while I was pushing the VAD’s down to the SICU with my patient.
The rest of the day at work kicked my ass, but really that is inconsequential. I can’t believe how that happened. How I felt. I’m glad I mentioned it to Jen so that I had someone to talk to about it. She is a very great friend and I could tell her anything. I don’t know what it means or why it happened but I definitely will pay attention when I feel that way. Almost like I dream my life before I live it.
Sami is fine, I’m still worried. I’ll watch her close and follow up with a doctor.
Maybe I need a psychic??
03/22/2009
This morning I could hardly focus on anything. Flashes of people I recognized and things I had done and conversations I had had flashed in my mind. It was happening while I was talking to people and trying to do tasks at work. I had a difficult patient with both an LVAD and RVAD with CVVHD and an open chest and belly. He was going to go to the OR after 11 and so his family was in there and I was answering questions and taking care of the patient. I felt like I couldn’t concentrate. It was like I was re-living something I had already lived before only I had this horrible feeling. I was flustered and could not keep on task. I resorted to writing everything down as I thought about it (the tasks to do) so that I could take good care of my patient.
I have had many déjà vu. Most are fleeting, but it seems like I dream stuff and then it happens. Is it for-warning? I have no idea. I have tried to start a dream journal, because I have such bizarre dreams, but I never write in it. This experience was almost like I had dreamt it last night and now I was experiencing it.
I thought maybe I was feeling weird because I hadn’t eaten. I grabbed a cup of OJ and some carrots and wolfed those down. But I still felt disconnected. I told my friend Jen at work that I felt really weird like something was going to happen to my kids or something.
I can’t remember how much later – maybe an hour – Sami called me and I just happen to be at a point where I could answer my cell phone. This rarely happens, even when I’m expecting a call, if I’m at work, chances are I won’t be able to answer it. She said that Matt had texted me that she had passed out in the kitchen and hit her head. I asked her a few questions and then called Matt and told him to get her up to the ER. I’m sure if I would have been at home and watched it I wouldn’t have freaked out as much, but not knowing why it happened and if her head was ok, was causing me some visible distress.
I looked at the Trauma call list to see who the attending was. I work with them pretty closely and I wanted to know if Trauma would see her or if just the ER doc’s would. I found out it was Dr. Nirula and he happened to be our attending in the SICU also. So, I walked the unit and when I asked the resident if she had seen him, he called out from the PAX (x-ray) room. As soon as I opened my mouth to talk to him I started bawling. Why do I have to love my kids so much and get so worked up at the very idea that she might really be hurt? More than ANYTHING I hate crying at work. I don’t know why. I work with some of my very bests friends (as they have come to be) and have cried WITH them for one reason or another.
Dr. Nirula was awesome. He is number one in my book. He is the end all be all to me. He called down to the ER and had Sami listed as a Trauma 3 so that they would take her right in and he could take a look at her. How awesome is that!!! I was still shook up but it made me feel better. I told the charge nurse what happened and started crying AGAIN and since he was training another charge nurse he was able to take over my patient and send him off to the OR while I went down to the ER.
I have to thank my ever present OCD habits at this time. My patient was all ready for the ER and I felt good leaving him with another nurse. Of course, Stewart is mucho smarto and he was my first preceptor when I was a CCNI, so he (my patient) would have been in good hands either way.
Matt texted me and by the time I walked downstairs they had her in a room and hooking her up to the monitor – insert mom beginning to cry again. Long story short, they don’t know why she fainted but it was probably just a vaso-vagal response that just happens sometimes. A CT scan was done and her noggin was in the clear. Her labs looked fine and her exam was negative. The resident taking care of her had already done her rotation in the SICU so it was nice to see her. Then the attending in the ER came in and gave me his card and he watched over her personally. Dr. Nirula came down to talk to us and see her. Just as he walked in she turned gray and vomited. So, they gave her a liter of fluid and some IV nausea medicine and watched her for a bit. She ended up going home after about an hour. I am still worried about why it happened and I think I’ll take her to her regular doctor to just do some checking, but it sure did freak me out. My mother instinct was just too strong.
While this was going on I checked on my patient in the OR and he was hanging in there. Then when they had planned her discharge and I had talked to the attending I headed back up to the OR. Sami was on her way home while I was pushing the VAD’s down to the SICU with my patient.
The rest of the day at work kicked my ass, but really that is inconsequential. I can’t believe how that happened. How I felt. I’m glad I mentioned it to Jen so that I had someone to talk to about it. She is a very great friend and I could tell her anything. I don’t know what it means or why it happened but I definitely will pay attention when I feel that way. Almost like I dream my life before I live it.
Sami is fine, I’m still worried. I’ll watch her close and follow up with a doctor.
Maybe I need a psychic??
No wait, maybe I need to be a psychic.
Big HUGE thank you's to the nurse, Tara, for taking great care of her. Dr. Nirulla for using his special trauma attending powers to get her in quickly and Dr. Linscott for watching over her personally. I would like to send some big props to the resident that took care of her, but in my madness, I don't remember her name! DUOH!
Blog on.....
Not to get too personal but was Aunt Flow in town? At her age I would pass out and throw up because of cramps almost every month. Just a thought, I hope everything is okay. Give her our love!
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